Wednesday, July 09, 2008

Why I am missing for so long??...........



When I look back my blog....I am surprise I have not updating my blog for nearly half of year, what happened to me!!! During this period I do not stop reading blog...other people blog but where is mine?

When I am writing this entry, I am sitting in Shanghai Pudong airport to Hong Kong. Frankly speaking, there are many events happening on me, first of all I am call to rescue to take up an additional assignment that require me to work in two cities in a week for unspecific time frame. I have done this since Jan and I am really tired....really tired, not so much of physically tired but mentally tired.

I continue wrtting my entry but this time I am sitting at Hong Kong International airport waiting to on board KA872 back to Shanghai after a 10 days holiday break ( I don't know it is a holiday!!!), so what have I did for the past 10 days since I written this entry at Shanghai Pudong airport....really not much... beside went back 3 days 2 night to home town visiting my mum ( try to be a good son but always not enought!) then spend another 4 days 3 night in Phuket with my wife ( I felt more tired after the holiday!) and finally spend a night gather with some old school mate in KL (just one night for many many years after our last meet!! sorry old friends -this is life!).

Now, I am sitting at the end of my holiday and tomorrow the reality is back! but the issue I have was I still uncharge, not recover from my mental block that suppose to be refresh after the holiday ! What should I do!!

During my 10 days break, I continue to think and think and think..what's going on with me!! What have been lost in me....what I want going forward...how should contunue my life!!! so many questions...Have I find my answer yet! NO!!! Definitately not!!!

Sometime I wonder ! am I suffer from depression! I presume if you realisze you are suffering from depression, most probaly you are not! I am not sure but I have too many questions unanswer!

I keep on wrtting down my emotional status....I continue to park away my feeling on my writting ( not on this blog!!), hopefully I can be self adjusting.

GOD BLESS ME!!!!